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Tags: relationships, affairs, affair
 Lovers, Mistresses- who are we to judge them? You sometimes wonder, how can being involved in extramarital affair be wrong, when it feels so right and it frees your mind from the restraint world of marriage? What if you realize having an affair works for you? It gives you a breather, a place where you can look at things beautifully and aesthetically.
It gives you an opportunity to look at your marriage outside the box. Instead of pushing you to get out of your marriage, it’s inspiring you to improve your married life and yourself. You have become more understanding and less controlling. Being a lover to someone else's husband has made you a wonderful wife.
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Having an affair is not wrong until you get caught and when you do get caught all hell breaks loose. So here are some few helpful tips on avoiding getting caught and of course keeping your affair clandestine and blissful at the same time. Beware of a bachelor lover- they usually have nothing to lose and if the affair gets serious, you might find yourself trapped in blackmail.
They might find it hard to follow the number one rule- know where you stand. Being a mistress or a lover has certain guidelines and boundaries. You should never demand, never nag and never impose pressure; it’s the wife’s job. Imposing pressure will make him panic. Panic means not thinking straight, thinking straight means being dumb and being dumb means getting not caught.
On the other hand, it’s your job to be beautiful, fun and sexy, to pamper and be pampered- not bad at all. Do your rendezvous outside the town. It’s a small world and people love to talk. They can sense an affair miles away. So, if you want to watch a movie, stroll in the mall, watch the sunset or whatever- do it in the next town.
Never travel together. A lot of things can happened in traveling, by land or by air. Accidents are never in your control and the last thing you want is to see both your faces in the evening news. Never ever keep souvenirs. May it be in sex or in real vacation; keeping keepsakes can put you in trouble.
Especially in sex, leaving kiss, bite and/ or scratch marks is definitely a no-no. So girls, cut your nails short- it’s not worth the risk. Never let him overstay his welcome. Give your man a curfew. If he needs to be home by 10pm, let him leave by 9pm. By doing this it will prevent the spouse from being suspicious.
Absence of spousal suspicion will give both of you a little less worry in your affair. No chaperone please. A chaperone has the tendency to talk to their best friends and their close friends. Especially for your man who has the tendency to have their buddy as chaperone for your escapades.
There are two kinds of friends- the one who wants to bang your girlfriend and the true one, either way, they will eventually tell you. Best buddies have the possibility to tell their girlfriends or wives and other buddies- meaning they talk. Those kinds of talks are the ones you want to avoid.
Never let guilt take the best of you. If you feel extremely guilty in having an affair maybe it’s time to end it. Guilt cause you to self destruct, it makes you feel bad about yourself. It is the guilt that destroys the marriage. However, if having an affair makes your marriage stronger and makes you wiser- then who are we to stop you.
Don’t let the norms of society abstain you from being happy. As long as it makes you a better person, go ahead…Besides,“ What they don’t know wont hurt them.”
About the author
The author of this article, Ruth Purple, is a successful Relationship Coach who has been helping and coaching individuals and couples for many years. Ruth recently published an easy to follow course on how to get your cheating spouse back. Click here to get more info about Winning Your Man Back From Infidelity.
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