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Tags: relationships, conflict, dealing with a selfish person
 Thoughtlessness- such a broad word, there are two underlying meanings of this word. The positive connotation is a person who would thoughtlessly sacrifice his own for another. Like a mother would instantaneously give up her own comfort for her child. A soldier who would face a bullet for a noble cause.
These are heroic acts of thoughtlessness. There is also the negative meaning of being thoughtless. Those people who never think of other things except themselves. You know those people who would cut in line in front of you, who would step on your foot just to get ahead. In this article, I am going to talk about these kinds of people who has a gift in hurting other people’s feelings.
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My good friend inspired me to write a topic about having a thoughtless lover. She called me almost eleven in the evening, sobbing like a child because her husband, who came from a three day business trip from Chicago didn’t bring anything for her. She said she would understand if he was tight on cash but he bought items for himself like a pair of shoes, an expensive attaché case and a mobile phone, which he has a couple already! She is aching with disappointment that her husband never even thought of her while buying all those stuff.
What hurt my friend more was that she even gave him extra cash for financial security… and he didn’t bring anything for her, not even a cheap wallet or a hat! This incident infuriates my friend. Such thoughtless acts made her feel like a child who has been rebuked. “What have I done to deserve this from him? I don’t understand because I cannot do what he has done to me!” she continued to lament.
Morning after that incident, she invited me for breakfast in a café, I can still see the raw disappointment in her. Her eyes were sad and puffy; her whole face was forlorn- I felt sorry for her. “I feel like I am trapped in this relationship- he didn’t even apologize.
It’s not the material thing. It’s the thought that counts, you know. I am hurt but I cannot change him. He is that, I just have to endure, I guess.” She said teary- eyed as she accepts her fate. I admire her maturity, though some people might find this incident trivial but to some being thoughtful counts a lot.
And to my friend, it’s her only consolation-to be remembered, appreciated. When our feelings get hurt, we naturally lash out in defense, but if you really think about it, lashing out can only do more harm than good. In dealing with a selfish person, you have to step back from yourself.
Thoughtless person will always hit your ego therefore the best way in dealing with a selfish person is never let your ego define you. If you are being bombarded with thoughtless acts remember to go to a calmer place. Don’t let it shake your balance. My friend was hurt by her husband’s thoughtless act but what hurt her more is that her husband is missing out the beauty of being a thoughtful person- the selfless gratification of making someone happy because it makes you happy.
About the author
The author of this article, Ruth Purple, is a successful Relationship Coach who has been helping and coaching individuals and couples for many years. Ruth recently published an easy to follow course on how to get your cheating spouse back. Click here to get more info about Winning Your Man Back From Infidelity.
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