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Tags: relationships, conflict, stop looking at other women
 Earth- composed of 70% water and 30% land. It is also made up of various elements like 32% iron, 30% oxygen, 15% silicon, 14% magnesium, 3% sulfur, 2% nickel, and then much smaller piles of calcium, aluminum, and other trace elements. It is also inhabited by “Homo sapiens”… beautiful Homo sapiens… young, vibrant and sexy female Homo sapiens.
You can see a bunch of them on the mountains, on the beach, rural and urban areas. Earth is a veritable playground for frisky male Homo sapiens. And in one little island called Manhattan, a confused and frustrated female wants her male to stop looking at other female species. This female says that she loves his hair, his clothes, his wit and his sense of humor but she loathes his habit of ogling at other women.
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Yes, her boyfriend is one of those men who can never stop looking at other women. She tried several times to confront him, but she was having doubts that she might be making a mountain out of a mole hill. Until one fateful night, at a fancy restaurant, after eating fancy foods, her boyfriend was doing it again- “looking at other ladies!” At that moment, she felt bombarded by the earth itself, so she decided to finally confront him about the issue.
But much to her surprise, her ogling partner thought that it was silly of her to be concerned about “NOTHING”. He said “There is no harm in appreciating beauty. I look, but I don’t touch, and I don’t remember! This is who I am. Don’t try to change me!” Her boyfriend’s answer made her more confused and hurt.
Does this mean that she would just take this all in and accept his boyfriend’s habit of looking at other women? To what extent should we compromise our feelings? Is men’s habit of unable to stop looking at other women part of their genetic code, like farting? Can’t they help it? When your partner stares at other women, how do feel? Do you feel insulted? Not good enough? Embarrassed? Unattractive? Insecure? What if we try creating inner defenses for these unhealthy beliefs about ourselves? Defenses like believing and internalizing that we are unique and beautiful in our own right! Don’t you think we, women sometimes give our partners too much power that we allow them to define what we feel and think about ourselves? You should learn to define the line- if you think that there is emotional cheating that comes with staring at other girls; then it’s time to consider it as a serious matter.
There are things that we cannot control- like our partner’s habits, but we can always control our reactions and make ourselves rise to the occasion. When it comes to men, be careful with alterations; you pull the wrong thread and everything will fall apart. Once you try to change a man, it’s doomed to end.
They won’t budge a single centimeter. Many women have this dilemma from their partners and it is but human to feel embarrassed or hurt about it. But at the end of the day, figure out what really matters the most. Is he is loving, understanding and caring? Never allow that “2-minute episode” on the street to bother the fun and affection at home.
If you know what you’ve got and know what both of you got, then that is more than enough.
About the author
The author of this article, Ruth Purple, is a successful Relationship Coach who has been helping and coaching individuals and couples for many years. Ruth recently published an easy to follow course on how to get your cheating spouse back. Click here to get more info about Winning Your Man Back From Infidelity.
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