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Tags: relationships, friendship, friends with benefits
 Friends with benefits happens when too people who see each other for orgasm decides to talk afterwards. They decide to talk, eat together and meet outside the confines of the bedroom and actually enjoy each others company… or it can be the other way around. They are buddies who love to talk, eat together until they meet in the confines of the bedroom and discover they like giving each other orgasms.
There is this norm in friends with benefits, your not supposed to be emotionally involved. The silent rule is not to have any rule- no commitments. You have to be a highly evolved human being if you are able to separate your emotions to someone you do body slamming with in some cheap motel regularly.
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Granting you’re a highly evolved being or just jaded- if there’s any difference. Can friends with benefits work? The difference with a one night stand with this "advantageous affiliation" is when the involved people decide to have exclusive sex with each other but the option to date other people remains open.
People are often drawn to this kind of affair because of the excitement it brings. Only the two of them knows- the other colleagues remain oblivious- it’s a taboo. Friends with benefits can only work if both individuals have enough maturity. They like each other enough to sleep with each other but not enough to spend their whole life with each other.
So they decide to become a couple until the ideal person for them comes along. So it’s better to just enjoy the moment while it lasts. Enjoy the benefits without the complications of a real committed relationship. One thing that makes this kind of “friendship” work is the fact that it has less stress and no high expectations from the other person.
You don’t take each other seriously because you know you don’t need to. You talk like buddies, go out like buddies, you are allowed to flirt when you bumped into someone you like and your “friend” won’t mind. Yet, you have the bonus of sex. What can be more exciting than that? As long as you none of you falls in love the way couples do then there are no complications.
It’s less stressful when emotions don’t get in the way. Too much emotion complicates everything; jealousy and expectations develops. When emotion gets involved then the “friends with benefits” set- up is surely over and you can’t even recover the friendship part. Does this mean that you have to be devoid of emotions? Not necessary, devoid is such a strong word.
The best thing to do probably is to be the captain of your own emotions. Every relationship should have a goal- how do you want it to end or do you want it prosper? Friends with benefits couples should transcend and focus on the benefits of companionship. It’s a salute to every “friends with benefits couple” if they are able to surpass the lusty sex part and can still remain friends in the end even better if they rise above and become friends and lovers with commitment.
In whatever relationship you have, it is essential that there is growth and that’s what every couple should watch out for- the potential of the each party and the relationship to grow.
About the author
The author of this article, Ruth Purple, is a successful Relationship Coach who has been helping and coaching individuals and couples for many years. Get your copy of Ruth's latest ebook on Finding Mr. Right. Discover how you can Find Your True Love here.
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