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Tags: relationships, marriage, fall out of love
 Many marriages nowadays have ended in separation or divorce. Yet when they were married, they had the most meaningful ceremony, they had a festive reception and they went on the sweetest and longest of honeymoons. Then after a few years, something happened- before they can’t get enough of each other, now they can’t stand being together.
The honeymoon stage is over and reality sets- in, the couple realizes they have fallen out of love. All those years of emotional and physical all for nothing and also not to mention all the expenses to experience a memorable wedding ceremony all went in vain. Why then do couples separate? People fall out of love because people change.
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Their feelings, their decisions, their values, the way they think change. If a few years back, they love that person, now they hate that same person. In a span of several months or years, a chain of incidents might have occurred to get people to fall out of love. They might have discovered that the spouse they have married is not the genuine thing that they had expected.
Through the length of time they have been copulating and when all inhibitions and consciousness are gone, the couples have shown their “true” color- instead of being comfortable about it, the couple can’t take the true person in their spouse, thus they fall out if love. They are no longer as loving or caring or responsible as when they were newly weds.
Many incidents might have made emotional withdrawals in the part of a spouse or both spouses so that they have distanced themselves. Another cause why couples fall out of love is because spouses allowed themselves to distant from each other. They let romance slip out of their marriage. They find no effort to work things out.
They failed to maintain and nourish their loving relationship. They saw it slipping from they hands but they continued to let go of it. Spouses are distant because in the onset, their relationship was not based on true love. They might have confused attraction and lust for devotion. This kind of confusion plus the other factors mentioned above is sure way for couples to fall out of love.
What they might have experienced was a mere fancy and not passion. Fondness not adoration. After the honeymoon stage was over, the responsibilities of married life has set in, the coming of the children, the trouble with in-laws, balancing the finances, growing old… These have taken the sparkle from married life.
So if spouses would like to preserve their marriage, they have to do the opposite of the three reasons. They have to nourish the marriage with romance, love and understanding. Both have to work on in and not only one spouse. They have to take time with each other to build each other’s trust.
If help is needed, there are professional marriage counselors which can be approached or pastors, priests and nuns which are trained on marriage counseling. Couples should also go down the memory lane and recall the good memories that they have together, anything to prevent couples from falling out of love.
It is best to preserve the marriage because time and effort and a lot of feelings were spent on it.
About the author
The author of this article, Ruth Purple, is a successful Relationship Coach who has been helping and coaching individuals and couples for many years. Get your copy of Ruth's ebook The Art of Happy Marriage. Learn the secrets to a Successful Marriage.
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