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Tags: relationships, marriage, saving your marriage before it starts
 Getting married is such a magical feeling. It's overwhelming with love and joy. You feel so sanctified because you have finally found the person that you want to be with for the rest of your life. But the nostalgia of "getting married" is different when you are already married. When you are married, the reality sinks in, the priorities and obligations nag your day-to- day living. And these priorities and obligations can sometimes turn into stress and tensions. And these stress and tensions can result to arguments and discords. And if these arguments and discords are left simmering, it can eventually hurt and destroy your marriage. I don't want to burst your bubble, but this is a fact.
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That's why I think it's best to do something about the marriage before it begins. Yes, saving your marriage before it starts is the wisest thing that you can do. And here are some important questions to ask before getting married. Since you are already thinking about getting married, I would assume that you absolutely and unconditionally love the person that you are going to marry and vice-versa. Therefore, I would not include questions that would involve love and fidelity. The questions below are about practical matters than can slowly rust a marriage when not properly discussed.
Questions about work and money matters:
1. How many hours a day do you work?
2. What is your dream job?
3.
Are you working in your desired profession?
4. Do you love your job?
5. What does your work demands? ( Are you prone to any danger? Spends lots of time away from home?)
6. What is your retirement plan?
7. What are you planning to do after retirement?
8. How much is your annual net income?
9. How important it is for you to make lots of money?
10. How much is you debt?
11. How much is you assets?
12. What percentage of your income are you willing to contribute to the relationship?
13. Should you have separate or joint accounts?
Questions about sex, parenthood and religion:
- What can make you in the mood for sex? (Be specific)
- Are you comfortable in initiating sex? Why?
- How often do you expect to have sex?
- Are you able to conceive?
- Do you want to have children?
- How many children are you planning are you planning to have and when?
- What kind of upbringing are you planning to instill on your child?
- Do you believe in raising your children near your extended family?
- What type of discipline do you intend to apply on your child? (Spanking, time-out, taking away privileges, etc)
- When it comes to raising children, do you believe in equality? Should girls be treated differently from boys?
- Do you believe in God?
- What does your faith entails?
- Is it a requirement for you that your partner should convert to your faith?
- Should your children be raised under your religious belief?
Getting married is a serious matter. That is why, once and for all, you need to have a clear answer for all of the questions above. Discuss this with your lover and decide what you can or cannot compromise, because in marriage, once you're in, you're in.
About the author
The author of this article, Ruth Purple, is a successful Relationship Coach who has been helping and coaching individuals and couples for many years. Get your copy of Ruth's ebook The Art of Happy Marriage. Learn the secrets to a Successful Marriage.
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