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Tags: relationships, post divorce, remarriage
 You never thought you can get out of it alive- divorce. It was traumatic; it was hard and arduous. It really drained the hell out of you- mentally, physically, financially and emotionally. Even the children had to adjust with the changes of your separation and the people you love were seriously worried about you.
Good thing the worst part is over- or is it? Almost three years has passed since the divorce and somehow you have learned to adjust and cope with the changes. You have dated now and then but nothing serious but lately you have been seeing someone for almost a year now and things are getting quite serious.
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You are thinking about remarriage. Your friends seem to think so it’s good for and it’s about a time- three years is long enough a time to be single. Your loved ones now seem to encourage you , to have that somebody who will take care and love you and vice versa.
You understand their concern but you are having doubts if remarriage is the right thing to do right now. Frankly, you are not sold-out with the idea of being in a strong commitment again but on the other hand you worry about your age and missing the beauty of being in a romantic relationship again.
The fact of the matter, your worries and your loved ones concerns is uncalled for. They are unnecessary worries. Remarrying because you’re not getting any younger is just not right, not even practical. If there’s one thing you have learned from your divorce is the more you force things the more it is to get worst.
Getting married because of your age is one way or another a sign of shallowness and superficiality- we all know when it comes to romantic relationship love is but a number. And if you think you should remarry because you will be missing the magic of being in a romantic relationship is just ridiculous.
If you get married for that reason then you never learned. People should stop having ideals and high expectations in an affair because disappointment is generally followed by a divorce- instead of finding another blissful affair, before you know it you are now caught in a round two of hell and turmoil.
If these are the reasons for your remarriage then it’s utterly selfish. Start involving your children and assess if they are ready to have new dad or mom because it’s not all about you. Remarriage cannot heal you- it can only hurt you more if you’re not ready. Number of years in not a gauge if you are totally over with your past relationship- healing is a subjective matter.
Basically, you know you’re ready if you have learned from your past relationship- you are no longer angry or sad about it. You have seen your splendor and you have become a better person. You are not afraid to live and be yourself. You have learned to figure out that your past marriage has given you the opportunity to bring out your true substance and strength.
You have realized you are stronger, if you have awareness of the positive outcome of your past marriage then you are healed.
About the author
The author of this article, Ruth Purple, is a successful Relationship Coach who has been helping and coaching individuals and couples for many years. Get your copy of Ruth's ebook Breaking Free From Break Up. Learn how you can get your life back after a break up in 21 days - guaranteed!
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